Tuesdays with Sarah… Blurred Vision

A couple of Fridays ago, I had a procedure done that was somewhat of a feminine nature. And as with every other experience I have had with Dr. Nathan Ross and the nursing staff of Brookwood Women’s Center, everything was top notch. The entire outpatient ‘event’ went smoothly, and I was back home recovering in just a few hours. And thanks to the anesthesia, I had some of the best sleep I have had in about 8 years 🙂 (FYI – Elsie is 8 years old!)

The fabulous Dr. Nathan Ross and my sweet Zoe girl

I actually had another similar procedure done in April 2007, so my most recent ‘experience’ was very familiar. I remember the same early walk across the crosswalk to the waiting room. I remember being escorted into the pre-op room with instructions of how to change and what to expect next. I remember the consult with the anesthesiologist, the nurse, and of course, Dr. Ross. But one thing was different this time. Someone put a small round band aid like patch behind my ear to help with nausea. I was told it was good for 3 days. I was also given specific directions about when and how to dispose of it. I thought this patch was indeed a very nifty addition to my procedure, and I’m always a fan of anything that will help eliminate nausea!

Anti-Nausea Patch Behind Ear

The next day, physically I was feeling great. No cramps and no nausea! But later in the day, I noticed that I couldn’t read the words on my iPhone. The lines were really getting blurry. I had my glasses on, so I put my contacts on. Same thing was happening. I adjusted the text size on my phone to be the largest size it could be, and I was STILL struggling. I couldn’t read my book or my iPad either. It’s like my eyesight went sour in about a 36-hour period. I was absolutely perplexed at what was happening.  In no way did I associate my surgery with my vision.  Surely my uterus and my eyes are not connected!

I woke up Sunday morning, and my vision was the same, if not worse. I knew I was going to have to go back to work on Monday, and I was very worried about having to read the numerous spreadsheets I work with on a daily basis. So Sunday afternoon, I actually went to Target and purchased some reading glasses to wear along with my contacts! I just accepted that my vision had taken a turn for the worse, and I was going to have to make do until I could get an appointment with an eye doctor.

On Monday, I went to work, and sported the reading glasses all day long. I could not believe how my up-close vision had deteriorated… and so quickly! I had mentioned to Scott several times over the weekend how worried I was, and he encouraged me to set up an eye doctor appointment. By Tuesday though, I’m sure he was tired of hearing me moan about it! As we were lying in bed that night, I was once again discussing my eyesight, and Scott said, “Get up and take that patch off.”  My first thought was, “How rude and how random!” I was sharing my worries and anxieties with my husband over my rapidly fraying vision, and he cuts me off and tells me to take that patch off? Plus, I was already in the bed and did NOT want to get back up! I had totally forgotten that I still had it on. It was supposed to last for 3 days, but by this time, it was day 5. So I reluctantly got out of bed, and went through the proper steps to take the patch off and wash my skin, still making no connection between that patch and my vision.

The next morning, I didn’t really notice that my vision began improving. But by lunchtime, I was looking at my phone and realized I had forgotten my reading glasses. Then it hit me – I didn’t need them! I could see everything like normal! I was absolutely stumped. I thought I was definitely going crazy.

When I got home that evening, I was telling Scott about my vision improving. And before I finished my sentence, it hit me – IT WAS THE PATCH! I asked him if he thought the patch was the cause of my blurred vision, and he said yes.  That’s why he told me to take it off that night. I was so grateful that he thought of that patch and got me to remove it. I never realized how much I take simple physical abilities for granted!

As usual, my always opportunistic God took this experience to teach me yet one more spiritual lesson 🙂 One tiny patch was wrecking my vision. Nothing was working right. I couldn’t see things clearly. Every action I tried to take was somewhat hindered and interrupted by this patch. This tiny patch had a huge effect on my physical life. Well that got me thinking about my spiritual life. What small, tiny things are wrecking my spiritual life?

I wish I could say my spiritual life is perfect. But it’s not. I have several little ‘patches’ hindering my spiritual health. In particular, covetousness is one. That might seem very strange to you. I mean who really ‘covets’ these days? But I find myself coveting my friends’ churches… often.  Churches whose style of worship is more like what I’m comfortable with, whose children’s and youth ministries are well-established and over flowing with volunteers, where the church is financially healthy… WHERE IT’S EASY.

But this act of coveting is blurring my vision. It’s skewing my perception of our calling. Yes, worship style might not be exactly what I’m comfortable with yet, but quite frankly, it’s not about me, right?! We may struggle with getting volunteers for our children and youth ministries, but the number of kids is growing! And maybe financially we are struggling, but we are moving in the right direction! And who knows what next month holds? If I remember correctly, our God owns the cattle on a thousand hills! Who knows what He has up His gigantic holy sleeve? But I must take off this ‘patch’ of coveting, wash my heart with the water of His spirit, and let my vision then correct itself.

This whole experience reminded me of this scripture in Hebrews:

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. Hebrews 12:1-2

We need to throw off, peel off, wash off, whatever thing, patch, or sin, that hinders and entangles us. And our ‘thing’ can be any size. But the effect is the same. It hinders and entangles, it blurs and skews, it steals and destroys. What is your ‘patch’? Maybe it’s coveting or jealousy – something small like mine. Or maybe it’s fear. That has to be one of the most powerful ‘patches’ Satan has in his arsenal. Maybe it’s something super secretive, like some past abuse, that no one knows about, kind of like that patch hiding behind my ear, and it’s wreaking havoc of your life. Maybe it’s some gigantic item like addiction that is destroying you. It’s time to throw off everything that hinders and entangles that keeps us from hitting our stride in this race that He has marked out for us. It’s time. It’s time. Toss the patch.